bullies (was:extropian kids)

Anton Sherwood (dasher@netcom.com)
Tue, 26 Aug 1997 18:40:45 -0700

Mark Grant:
: You seem to be under the impression that kids are
: somehow rational, civilised people with whom you can "negotiate
: disputes", and ignore the rather obvious fact that most kids are
: far more vicious and irrational than most adults.

[tale of violence elided]

Kathryn Aegis:
: Again, I am sorry for your bad experiences as a child, and I think
: that most of us can share the same type of story. I do not, however,
: equate that experience with general childhood disputes.

Can it be separated from them?

: The learning of basic negotiation skills is a vital component to any
: child's development, to the extent that most childhood development
: books will devote at least a chapter to it.

Hm. I wish I'd learned better to negotiate with adults.
Still can't do it comfortably. I'm good at retreat, though.

: As for your 'obvious fact' above, I would ask that you provide some
: definite support for that statement, outside of your personal
: experience, in order to consider it a general truism.

Mark Grant:
: Uh, my experience, my friends' experiences, the experiences of those on
: this list... the only people I've met who didn't have similar tales to
: tell were either home-schooled or went to expensive private schools.

I feel left out. (I usually feel left out, dammit.)
I never got beat up, scrawny though I was.
In third or fourth grade I once fought Peter Benesch one-on-one.
(Gave him a black eye, or so he claimed; I never saw the shiner.)

Fifth/sixth grade (different town) was marginally worse.
On one occasion during recess my peers pushed me into a "fight" with
a classmate's kid sister.
On my way home a neighborhood bully tried on two occasions to pick
a fight, but I baffled him by not knowing the conventions. I suppose
he decided I was a sissy not worth scuffing his shoes.
And - I almost forgot - while waiting for the school bus in the morning,
I once stood by impotent while bullies made my sister lick spit off the

After that I was in an elite experimental school attached to the university,
where violence was simply infra dig.

Anton Sherwood *\\* +1 415 267 0685 *\\* DASher@netcom.com