Re: Responsibility for children

Date: Mon Aug 14 2000 - 09:41:34 MDT

> >Does anyone else here think is unfair and unjust
> >that a woman can always get out of the
> >responsibility for a child (before birth by
> >aborting it and after birth by putting it up for
> >adoption), while a man can literally be held
> >responsible for hundreds of thousands in expenses
> >just because he was careless enough not to use a
> >rubber

In a message dated 8/13/2000 7:06:24 PM Pacific Daylight Time, writes:

> So, yeah it might be rough on fathers of unwanted kids. But, hey, if
> a man who does not want to have kids there are ways to avoid it. If you
> careless, or get duped, or are just terribly unlucky, them's the breaks.
> When you get trimmed, just consider potential fatherhood one of the
> potential costs.

Fair is not a concept that applies to these kinds of things. Careless has as
it's roots the word: care.

Life ain't fair. Women know this better than anyone. It's not fair your
muscles are stronger than mine, is it?
; )
In the real world, "fair" doesn't exist. But cause and effect does.

You could examine your motives (and concepts of self responsiblity) instead
of looking outward for the fix to this situation.

If you were care-ful or care-ing, then your woman who you've impregnated will
care too, and take your opinion into account. You'd have been care-giving in
nature and wouldn't want to father a child that was unwanted and
undersupported. We assume you'd BOTH have known that sperm can make women

If you were careful in all your affairs, you would have chosen a sex partner
who was intelligent and supportive as well, and would not make you or your
child suffer. She's have agreed to discuss it with you and you would both
agree on whether or not it was an accident that should be corrected, or
something to celebrate and care for. Fairness has nothing to do with it.
Taking care does.

If cause and effect is not something you care about, I agree with zero, get a

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