Re: newtonmas story

From: Spike Jones (
Date: Sun Dec 23 2001 - 12:12:28 MST

> > From: "Spike Jones" I ask permission to commit
> > blasphemy, and be forgiven, before I even make up the
> > particular impiety.
> "J. R. Molloy" wrote: Permission granted.

OK, Ive made it up now, and Im pre-forgiven. Today's lesson
is in comparative religion.

Let us look at Islam vs Christianity. The Islamic government of
Afghanistan was faced with the problem of what to do about the
great stone Buddha idols, carved into the mountainsides of their
sacred land. Hating the idolatrous religion of Buddhism, the
Taliban decided to destroy the carvings, which led to a cry of
protest from, well, pretty much the whole world, for these
historical artifacts were unique. As you may recall, the Afghan
government took great offense at this, protesting that the Buddha-
Preservervation Society cared more about these blasphemous
idols than about the starving children of Afghanistan.

How would a more capitalist oriented government have handled
the situation? Likely it would have built a fence around the
idols at a 10 km radius, and allowed investors to build an airstrip
and concessions, in exchange for a 50% cut of the gate. They
could have erected signs on the fence: "INFIDELS ONLY!"
or perhaps "ALL CAMEL JOCKEYS KEEP OUT", etc.

Consider, the per capita income in Afghanistan before the war
was, what, about 200 bucks? 25 megapersons, thats about...
5 billion dollars a year. 5 billion? HAH! For Disneyland, that's
pocket change. They take in that much money every day
before lunch. They could have set up BuddhaLand, charged
50 bucks a head. The Chinese tourist trade *alone* coulda
tripled their per capita. Honestly, Afghanistan could have
fed its own starving masses, simply by charging admission to
the Buddhist statues. Anarcho-capitalism to the rescue!

If they really wanted to destroy Buddhism, they could do that
Disney style too, by marketing it to death, the way Americans
do. Disneyland has its Mickey Mouse, the Afghans could have...
Buddha Bunny. Then they could run it further into the ground:
Zen Zebra and the 12 dwarves, (the Dharma Dozen).

Think of the income, in plastic figurines alone!

Speaking of comparative religions and figurines, they need
to do something about the Buddha image. Just look at
him, big old flabby beer gut. Sloppyyyy. Compare with
Christianity, check it out next time you see a crucifix.
Jesus was buff! Chiseled! That sucker had abs!

Oh, the Afghans coulda made a *ton* of money off of
BhuddaLand, and still kept their PRECIOUS belief system
intact, but noooooo.

*Sigh* spike

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