Re: Science With A Smile

From: J. R. Molloy (
Date: Sun Nov 18 2001 - 10:39:56 MST

My favorite, partly because the author's unknown:

A certain Phys Rev referee
Considers all papers with glee:
"What's new is not true,
And what's true is not new,
Unless it was written by me."


A Brief History of Gravity
by Bruce Elliott

It filled Galileo with mirth
To watch his two rocks fall to Earth.
He gladly proclaimed,
"Their rates are the same,
And quite independent of girth!"

Then Newton announced in due course
His own law of gravity's force:
"It goes, I declare,
As the inverted square
Of the distance from object to source."

But remarkably, Einstein's equation
Succeeds to describe gravitation
As spacetime that's curved,
And it's this that will serve
As the planets' unique motivation.

Yet the end of the story's not written;
By a new way of thinking we're smitten.
We twist and we turn,
Attempting to learn
The Superstring Theory of Witten!


Condensed Story of Ms Farad
by A. P. French

Miss Farad was pretty and sensual
And charged to a reckless potential;
But a rascal named Ohm
Conducted her home -
Her decline was, alas, exponential.


Einstein, Podolsky and Rosen
by David Halliday

Two photons, close-coupled at start,
Flew several parsecs apart.
Said one, in distress,
"What you're forced to express
Removes any choice on my part."


The Cat in the Tree
by Peter Price

Another great Dane has made free
With a question of Be or Not be.
Now might Schr"dinger's puss,
In descending by Schuss,
Leave one track on each side of a tree?


The Past Isn't What it Used To Be
by Bruce Elliott

A professor of Physics named May
Complains of the classroom today,
"The problem, you know,
Is that they're too slow.
We were far better students than they."

His friend, a professor named Beecham,
Said "It's true, you don't seem to reach 'em.
But they're not to blame,
For they haven't the same
Class of teachers that we had, to teach 'em!"


A Physicist from Nantucket
by Michael Van Leeuwen

There once was a man from Nantucket
...oops...just got a life.

This archive was generated by hypermail 2b30 : Sat May 11 2002 - 17:44:19 MDT