> Absolutely. The last time I was really tremendously furious was, oooh,
> probably 91 or 90. It's just not worth getting so attached to something
> that you get pissed off when it is thwarted/broken/negated etc. And
> yes, bad things have happened, people have been mean to me, I've been
> fairly comprehensively betrayed by very close friends a couple of times
> in the last 6 years, but I never became enraged or furious. *I'm* in
> charge, not my hormones.
The problem is that you have fight-or-flight responses without deciding to. If you have such, and decide not to get angry, you supress the anger, and that is stress. Apparently it is quite healthy to get angry every now and then, because lowers your stress levels.
I've been trying to work out how to do this in some kind of useful manner. I don't normally get angry, but I know that the stress builds because of this. The problem is that I find the expression of anger distasteful, which many here might identify with.
Maybe I've got to play sport. Exercise is supposed to be wonderful for stress, I guess I've got to find time. But when you're faced with decisions like "Either I read another chapter of Hofstader, or I go and play indoor soccer" - well, what would you do?
What I really need is a little bubble of no-time where I can sit and read for as long as I like without impacting on the rest of my life. My wife might be surprised at how quickly I am aging, but maybe with life extension I can compensate. Then time on the exercise bike might not seem like such a waste.
the early nineties - the angry years