Re: Offered without comment or warranty

Natasha Vita More (natasha@natasha.cc)
Thu, 14 May 1998 17:51:10 -0500


At 12:36 PM 5/13/98 +0000, you Damien wrote:

>Are you a later-born, Anders? Max? Natasha? Greg? Keith? John? Anyone?

I was a later-born with three older siblings and one much younger. The
stress level was a bit high during my developmental years into early
adulthood due to the competitive nature of my older siblings and expected
elevated creativity. Being from a family of artists and scientists
(medical doctors and engineers), I felt most pressure coming from the need
to keep up and be unique.

My family put emphasis on creative ideas (father's influence) and
development of many female friendships (mother's influence). In that most
of my influence comes from the combination of both, I (being on the
youngest-end) had to prove myself beyond the family norm. I was often
teased and left out of things which resulted in my inner search and
personal exploration.

Being a later-born, I was able to watch and digest the actions of my older
siblings, learning from their interactions in the world. Because my
sister's proclamation that she never wanted me to be born, I made it my
quest to seek out non-biological "sisters" -- procuring and nurturing my
many relationships with women. Because of my families obvious and open
support of the male siblings, I worked harder to prove that females were as
capable as the males. A situation that riddles me to this date.

Thus, my creativeness stems from having to keep up and prove myself early
on and a desire to combine art and science while paying very special
attention to my own femininity and the support from and giving to friends.
I struggle with anxiety and have learned behavioral methods to tone it
down. I am not innately relaxed, but practice it as a way of finding a
"zen-like" quality in my life. (Meditation, creative visualization and
exercise.) I'm not always successful at it, but recognize it as being a
useful tool to letting my unconscious flow.

Natasha