Re: is marriage extropic?

From: Amara Graps (
Date: Sat Dec 02 2000 - 03:43:14 MST

From: Samantha Atkins <>, Thu, 30 Nov 2000

>Due to the lingering effects of the patriarchy most guys are arrogant
>selfish twits who shouldn't be allowed out in polite society. :-)


twits ? no ...
arrogant ? no ... lots of bluster.. but it's transparent quickly

selfish ? yes, no doubt, and not the "good" selfish resulting from the basic
          human needs of living for oneself, but the selfish that results from
          a kind of tunnel vision, unable to see outside of a range of vision,
          often concluding in careless actions.

To me, the interaction with other humans is simple, an extension
of "Know Thyself": every action has consequences, so then take a look
at one's own actions and notice the consequences. If you can't see
the consequences very well, then step in another's shoes to see. And
if the consequences are not valuable, then don't interact with other humans.
I have very little understanding of careless interactions, maybe because
I don't, or I consciously try not to, treat people carelessly. I've
seen careless behavior much more in men, than in women.

For me, every interaction with someone has meaning. If I communicate
in some way, then it means that I gave that interaction some thought,
I put it at the top of my priority list and I expressed myself, no matter
what cost to me (and sometimes the cost is quite high). If an interaction
with a person was not meaningful to me, then I don't give them any
thought. My interaction has this weight, whether I told someone
congratulations (more often), or I told someone that I was adversely
affected by their actions (more rare).

>of them have ingrained "me man, you my woman" BS at some level that
>precludes real equality in a male-female relationship.

maybe cultural ... I've observed that perspective more in Europe,
than in the U.S.

>Many men are
>still scared shitless of a woman as smart/capable (or heaven forbid)
>smarter than themselves.

Many ? Maybe "some". And those fears are easy to see too, often being
manifested by the fellow in a kind of "controlling" behavior.


Amara Graps email:
Computational Physics vita: finger
Multiplex Answers URL:
"Sometimes I think I understand everything. Then I regain
consciousness." --Ashleigh Brilliant

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