Changes in human sexuality and the family (was: male birth control pill)

From: John M Grigg (
Date: Wed Jul 19 2000 - 22:10:51 MDT

Scott Badger(I believe) wrote:
>My hope is that the male
>pill will indeed take us a step closer toward a more
>relaxed attitude toward our sexuality, but not a more
>relaxed attitude toward the responsibilities of
>marriage and/or family. We really need to get past the
>paradigm where women sort men by the size of their
>wallets and men sort women by their potential for
>sexual gratification. I have to admit though, these
>hopes are probably unrealistic on my part.

Actually, transhumanist technologies may give us at least some reason to hope for such a grand change in the current male/female courtship paradigm. In a world where through nanotech everyone is beautiful(in different ways of course) and material prosperity abounds, we may see people be able to rise above the old way of doing things.

Of course, looks will still matter, but in the way clothes do now! Simply because bodies over time may become very vulnerable to trends in "fashion." Until it gets very cheap and quick to morph one's form; I will expect some snobbery still in terms of looks.

And even than, we will see various subcultures and "tribes" who see themselves as elitest and "cooler" than other groups. So bodies will more than ever show which group we belong too.

Unless we have a full "santa nano-claus" economy; I see social status(ability to attract partners) among people (and especially men) being largely determined by career and financial muscle.

Even in a basically "nano-claus" economy I would expect those people who achieve more professionally to be allowed greater access to resources in which to create things with their near-anything boxes. And they may be allowed to create items(spacecraft, etc.) which the common citizen is banned from making. So again, in the case of men who are such achievers, they will have a definite advantage in gaining the attentions of the most interesting, intelligent and attractive women. The "Aristoi" position of power in the classic novel is an example of what may be yet to come.

Zeb Haradon replied:
Also required are cures for various STDs.
Ideally: full cures and vaccines for HIV, herpes, and HPV, (are
cures/vaccines for the latter two being worked on anyplace?) as well as a
wider testing for bacterial STDs.

Yes, so much libido killing worry is generated by people today due to the fear of contracting an STD. Imagine how people would at least for awhile "go crazy" if overnight all worries of pregnancy and STD were taken care of by new technologies. Whew!! I think the rate of promiscuous sex and especially infidelity would rather permanently shoot up... People would have to find the real reasons "of the heart" to stay loyal to long-term partners.

The following advances will really revolutionize the family...
1. Fear of unwanted pregnancy eliminated
2. Sexually transmitted diseases eliminated
3. Artificial wombs commonplace
4. Robot maids, cooks and nannies commonplace, inexpensive and dependable

A common mid-twenty first century household will be utopia compared to how families had to slave and suffer in past centuries. Of course, people will be living there... lol

>My hope is that the male
>pill will indeed take us a step closer toward a more
>relaxed attitude toward our sexuality, but not a more
>relaxed attitude toward the responsibilities of
>marriage and/or family.

The children of the 21st century will sadly bear the burden of divorce and absentee parents as many children in the 20th century did. I know the pain of it myself as many also do. Every family/couple is different, but I often think selfishness and a lack of mutual respect is at the core of many of these wrecked families.

I think some marriages do have to end in divorce, but often either the union should have never happened or the couple did not have the skills to make it work as it could have.

I would like to see a world where children in middleschool, highschool and college are required to take classes about having healthy relationships and preparing for the possibility of marriage with the prospect of it being a happy one. And combined with this would come training in parenthood. I think this could help at least a little. Getting the right training(by word and example) at home would be the best way where possible...

In terms of infidelity I sometimes think about what I have heard of as the "european version" of the open marriage. The spouses may cheat but keep it subdued and do not make a public scene. They keep the matter to themselves generally and so do not have the classic "open marriage." They still strive to love their spouse and stay loyal to the children and household. To fall in love with the other person and want to leave their mate and children is considered to be wrong in this take on marriage.

I wonder if in a world free of STD's and unplanned pregnancies, if this will be a common "marital social contract" between couples. Of course, lies are said to be much more vicious to a marriage than actual sex with another person. The deception is what can poison things. But, to be open about things when your partner is tortured by your actions is also a very bad thing. And when people doubt they can gain consent than they may...

With neuro-jack VR and nanotech built pleasure androids perhaps people will sublimate their desires to be unfaithful. Being with another very real and flawed human being may always contain a very erotic charge though.



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