(Very Off-topic.. but a little humor is a good thing, you know.)
From: phil osborn (philosborn@hotmail.com) Sat, 27 May 2000
>I have yet to hear of people having sex with motorcycles -
>altho now I'm starting to think maybe I shouldn't put the suggestion
>out there.
Then how about hogs and motorcycles? :-)
Happy Sunday.
Amara
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Hogs in Love
Key West Rallies to Save Amorous Pig (from San Francisco Examiner,
1996)
KEY WEST, Fla. (AP) - Chi-Chi the potbellied pig is about this
close to being castrated. His crime: falling in love with another
hog - a Harley Davidson.
Chi-Chi tried to have sex with the front wheel of the shiny black
motorcycle he found in Walter Wyatt's yard. In the process, the
50-pound beast scratched the paint and tore the bike's fabric
cover.
Wyatt's wife, Patricia, saw the whole thing from her kitchen and
called police. There was at least $100 damage to the brand-new
bike, she said.
Animal control officers say Chi-Chi's fate is pretty much sealed,
since state law requires them to neuter all unclaimed strays. Then
it's off to a petting zoo.
But not if Wyatt and other residents in this independent-minded
city have their way.
"His crime is an alleged sex act against a Harley," Wyatt said
Wednesday. "We don't even know if that's a felony!"
A developer has raised $300 for the "Spring Chi-Chi" defense fund.
Wayne Smith, president of the Monroe County Bar Association, is
handling the case pro bono. "The punishment could be death or what
some males may consider a fate worse than death," Smith said.
A motorcycle salesman was considering offering to let Chi-Chi go
hog-wild in his showroom, just to get the lust out of his gut.
"Just a night's stay," he said.
And given that Chi-Chi's owner has chosen not to reclaim him, at
least one person has offered to adopt the pig - even if there's
less of him to love.
The would-be owner wrote to the Chamber of Commerce and ended his
letter: "P.S. I have a broken scooter. It's his."
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Amara Graps email: amara@amara.com
Computational Physics vita: finger agraps@shell5.ba.best.com
Multiplex Answers URL: http://www.amara.com/
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"It works better if you plug it in." -- Sattinger's Law
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