HUMOR: Ebonics

Chris Hind (chind@juno.com)
Tue, 28 Jan 1997 11:13:00 -0800


WARNING: This contains content which I recieved in an anonymous fax and
retyped for clarity and electronic transmission and which may offend some
people, household products, and furniture. Reader discretion is advised.

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Ebonics Lesson

A friend of mine has an 18 year old son named Leroy. He attends Oakland
High School where they teach Ebonics as a second language. Last week he was
given an easy homework assignment. All he had to do was put each of the
following words in a sentence. This is what Leroy did.......

1. Rectum... I had two cadillacs, But my ol' lady rectum both.
2. Hotel... I gave my girlfriend da crabs and the hotel everybody.
3. Odyssey... I told my bro, you odyssey the jugs on this hoe.
4. Stain... My mother-in-law axed if I was stain for dinner again.
5. Seldom... My cousin gave me two tickets to the Knicks game, so I seldom.
6. Penis... I went to da doctor and he handed me a cup and said penis.
7. Catacomb... Don King was at the fight the other night, man. Somebody
give that catacomb.
8. Foreclose... If I pay alimony this month, I'll have no money foreclose.
9. Undermine... There is a fine lookin' hoe livin' in the apartment undermine.
10. Tripoli... I was gonna buy my old lady a bra but I couldn't fine no
tripoli.
11. Coincide... When it rains I coincide.
12. Disappointment... My parole officer tol me if I miss disappointment
they gonna send me back to the big house.
13. Income... I just got in bed wit dee hoe and income my wife.
14. Honor... At the rape trial, the judge axed my buddy, who honor first?
15. Fortify... I axed da hoe how much? And she say fortify.
16. Israel... Alonso tried to sell me a rolex, I said man, that looks fake,
He said, no israel.

Needless to say, Leroy got an "A". God bless America!

"Risk: You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage
to lose sight of the shore."

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Chris Hind (chind@juno.com) Upward, Outward, ACTION!
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