Re: just me

From: Samantha Atkins (samantha@objectent.com)
Date: Sat Sep 16 2000 - 03:15:19 MDT


Adrian Tymes wrote:
>
> Samantha Atkins wrote:
> > Someone asked offline whether I was a new person on the list or a nym of
> > someone else. For the record I am a new person here and not a 'nym of
> > myself or anyone else and I am not related to Brian Atkins. I simply
> > have the same not-that-uncommon last name.
>
> Would it be fair to ask how long until Atkins overtakes, say, Smith?
> ^_-
>

You mean Smith as in the Matrix agent common name? :-) Shit, they're
onto us.

> > What else? The pattern is a bit different in that I have strong
> > empathic abilities and a deep mystical streak. I mainly and
> > successfully fight the latter these days and don't make that much use of
> > the former. But at one time I almost decided it was time to junk the
> > high-tech career and become the first Sister of the Church of the Holy
> > Nanite. :-)
>
> Well...you don't have to fight it. Empathy can give you insight into
> human nature...and to the best of our knowledge, which species built all
> this high tech stuff that we're working with? Guessing based on, "if I
> was a typical programmer/system designer/whatever I know the maker of
> what I'm faced with was, how would I have set this up," has saved me
> much time in the past. That is one of the things that sets applied
> computer science apart from, say, chemical engineering.
>
> > What can I say? I have an intermittenly over-active
> > God-module.
>

Well... I've considered that if there isn't a God (and I've spent most
of my life believing there isn't) then it is high time we built one -
build an intelligence that does have as close to all the
"omni"-characteristics possible in this universe. But without all the
high-handed ego-tripping attributed to such in some people's model. Or
better still become gods and goddesses ourselves. If we dare and are
willing to change as radically as that will require. It is a wierd
thing to think about when most of us have trouble even claiming what
human greatness and uniqueness is in us. We monkeys don't like to stand
out too much. Especially when we have little idea what the heck is
going on inside of us and less willingness to field our guesswork and
vague glimmerings lest the other monkeys ostracize us or worse.

But when the God module kicks in things happen similar to stuff in the
mystical literature. I don't levitate or anything really wild like that
but it feels as if my being is lifted up and sometimes turned inside out
and that I am within or in communion with or at least sense deeply this
much larger Presence, Power, whatever you want to call it. The "me"
disappears mostly or melts into whatever this is or gets recast
somehow. The emotions soar into the heavens. It goes beyond anything
I can put into words pretty rapidly. Often it will include what seems
like a tremendous amount of information and intensionality and directed
energy sweeping through me. I have guesses (ranging from faulty mental
wiring to too much religous upbringing to substances sampled in my
youth to Vingean powers looking for agents to ???) but no real
explanation for it. It just is - now and then. Thankfully rare enough
it doesn't totally sweep me away. It came close when I used to meditate
more. Whatever it is meditation intensified it quite a bit. So I
stopped doing that because shadows of whatever this is became too strong
to allow me to concentrate on my work easily.

- samantha



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