Re: First-date Intellectual Dazzlement

Date: Wed Jun 21 2000 - 22:52:31 MDT

Let's see if I have this right.

First date thread seems to revolve around a question of what happens
emotionally when 'man A', who thinks he is intelligent, is seeking an equal
companion. He begins testing his new acquaintance with a series of
predetermined subjects. We assume he found her attractive enough to ask out
-- now he is ascertaining if she will interesting to talk with over an
extended period of time.

    He sets forth the subjects nearest and dearest to him -- or maybe ones he
feels are "difficult" (i.e., only an intelligent/educated person would know)
and then sits back and watches how the female deals with them. By this he
then decides if she is worthy of further conversation. Because he realizes
that she may not be reacting 100% due to nervousness he is willing to go on
another date wit her, but how she orally replies to his tests determines how
he perceives her intelligence or lack thereof.

'Female B' replies saying: this is condescending and self defeating. Women do
not respond well to verbal tests, we have our own set of tests, based on your
emotional and social skills (which she calls filters). By "testing" your
prospective mate in such a conspicuously precipitate manner (which women can
see through easily) you are not showing good manners or a considerate nature,
and you are inadvertently repelling the very type of female you seek. On an
aside: perhaps your inspection/experiment is not effective, since you are
bungling the information stream by putting forth your own ideas and not
researching the delicate terrain of a woman's mind, but rather trying to
force her into your pattern.

Ergo: If she does not fit your design, it is your own inquest that has
muddled your judgment, not necessarily the lack of intelligence on behalf of
your date.

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