Re: Definitions (joke) ws(Drugs and Despair)

Date: Fri May 19 2000 - 08:26:58 MDT

In a message dated 5/19/2000 7:23:06 AM Pacific Daylight Time, writes:

> > > Demand accountability of the catecholamines!
> > >
> > wrote: for the laymen this translates to_________?
> Drugs taken by those who are getting doctrinal training for
> confirmation into the Catholic church? spike

Subject: Definitions!

> The Washington Post recently published a contest for readers in which
> they were asked to supply meanings for various words. The following
> were some of the winning entries:
> Abdicate(v),to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
> Carcinoma(n),a valley in California, notable for its heavy smog.
> Esplanade(v), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
> Willy-nilly(adj.) impotent
> Flabbergasted(adj.)appalled over how much weight you have gained.
> Negligent(adj.)describes a condition in which you absent-mindedly answer
> the door in your nightie.
> Lymph(v.)to walk with a lisp.
> Gargoyle (n) an olive-flavored mouthwash.
> Coffee(n) a person who is coughed upon.
> Balderdash(n) a rapidly receding hairline.
> Semantics(n)pranks conducted by young men studying for the priesthood,
> including such things as gluing the pages of the priest's
> book together just before vespers.
> Rectitude(n)the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a proctologist
> immediately before he examines you.
> The Washington Post's Style Invitational also asked readers to take any
> word from the dictionary, alter it by adding subtracting or changing one
> letter, and supply a new definition. Here are some recent winners:
> Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the reader
> who doesn't get it.
> Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
> Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very high.
> Innoculatte: To take coffee intravenously.
> Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.
> Dopeler effect:The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they
> come at you rapidly.
> Intaxication:Euphoria at getting a refund from the IRS, which
> lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

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