RE: Joe Dees appears to have a talent for writing song lyrics! lol

From: Joe Dees (
Date: Mon Apr 24 2000 - 14:36:31 MDT

('binary' encoding is not supported, stored as-is) >From: "john grigg" <>
>Subject: Joe Dees appears to have a talent for writing song lyrics! lol
>Date: Thu, 20 Apr 2000 14:14:06 PDT
>Joe Dees wrote:
>>In the Deep South it goes something like this...>> "Ah'm a Right-Wing
>>Redneck, rude, crude, mean and loud> I worship Jerry, Pat and Rush, and of
>>that fact I'm proud> I wanna keep my little woman by by side, yeah..> And
>>when she's barefoot, pregnant and silent then Ah'm satisfied."
>Mah baby fits me laka flesh tuxedoAn lak tuh sinker with mah pink
>torpedoThen dress mah baby up and go downtownHang Baby off mah arm an' show
>'er aroun'.Mah baby's with me 'cause she made tha gradeAh lak ta dress 'er
>laka Frederick's maidThen watch 'er clean tha house an' sashay roun'An'
>pinch 'er butt when she lays dinner down.Mah baby does me when Ah wanner
>tuAn' anything Ah wants mah baby ta doShe does it pronto - not so much as uh
>peepAn' keeps 'er trap shut when I goes ta sleep.Now you may say she's just
>a fantasyBut lemme tell ya - Baby's real to meAm I alone? No, that's just
>how it seemsShe's always with me in my porcine dreams.
>Joe, did you really write these? If so you have real talent writing bawdy
>lyrics. You should put them to music! You could have a real career in the
>comedy category of country music!
>I saw a skit on a comedy show where the actor, Randy Quaid was the host. In
>the skit he played a very redneck country singer with song titles like "if
>you don't like America, go straight to hell!" and "I love America, to hell
>with all foreigners!" They mentioned the names of about twenty of his songs
>and they all only slightly varied on this theme. As he sang the flag waved
>in the background, of course. The skit skewered its subject pretty well.
Yeah, Ah Diyuhd!
Here's another - a rap skewer (by using 60's imagery and a reminder of the dangers of unprotected sex to lampoon the rap message).

I'm a latex cowboy
Ridin' with my hand in a glove
Yeah, I'm a latex cowboy
'Cause I don't wanna die for love
And I'm a vulvic plowboy
Farmin' in the furrows of joy
And I'm a tantric taoboy
Knockin' my nirvana toy

If you chance to see me
I'll be struttin' with a smile on my face
'Cause my memories please me
Though anticipation gives 'em a race
If you find you need me
Take a number and get in line
'Cause many want to breed me
Too many for my limited time

And I'm a falcon fowlboy
Glidin' 'twixt the wings a' doves
Yeah I'm a latex cowboy
And if you're lucky you'll share my love
>best wishes,
>John Grigg
>Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at

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