Sorry I lost the original post.
I humbly suggest that you reconsider your intentions. What bothers me is that you state that you have a very particular question you feel the need to answer. Already a bad sign. In addition, this question has something to do with you and your personal experiences. IOW, you seem to be seeking to understand yourself more completely. Though laudable, this is not a good reason to become a psychiatrist or cognitive scientist.
Seek this line of work because you are completely
fascinated with it and because you truly wish to make a
contribution to the science, knowing full well that you are
currently too ignorant/naive to know precisely how you will
accomplish this task.